Discover LOVE beyond good or bad.
Is love the same or different depending on how and what we value? There is love at first sight, being smitten by love, romantic love, mature love, and love of family, child, work, or nation. Beyond the pens of the songwriter, poets and psychologists, we can also look at love as virtue or value and this is the realm of axiological (Philosophy dealing with values) science.
The Psychology of Love
Psychologist Robert Sternberg believes love is always a combination of infatuation, intimacy, and passion. He believes that combinations of these three pillars of love creates the following kinds of love or called the six faces of love: 1. Infatuation-love (foolish or extravagant love); 2. Empty-love; 3. Romantic-love; 4. Companionate-love (tastefully harmonious love); 5. Fatuous-love (complacently foolish love) , and 6. Consummate-love (supreme complete love) . To broaden our understanding of love in terms of values.
Axiological science, and its foremost application of axiological psychology, identifies three ways of seeing with values called Feeler (F), Doer (D) and Thinker (T) dimensions of value-vision. The most important is the one that enables us to appreciate the individuality and uniqueness of people. This is the dimension of seeing with Feeler (F) values supported by Doer (D) and Thinker (T) values. Here is a poetic definition of Feeler (F) value-vision: “The Soft-Touch Susie is a feeler / Wears her heart upon her sleeve / Empathy is her middle name / By your side, she’ll never leave!”
the Feeler, Doer and Thinker dimensions of value-vision as an alphabet of three letters FDT writing the language of love; or in this case, Sternberg’s pillars of love (i.e., intimacy, commitment, passion) and how they combine to form his six faces of love mentioned above.
When you begin to understand the feeler, doer, and thinker dimensions of value you may gain deeper insight into how your temperament and seeing with values shapes your love experiences. Confident in your love, you may avoid looking for love in the wrong places and move forward without fear. Understanding how you can lead yourself astray, and make bum love choices, puts you in a sound position to take meaningful corrective actions. As a bonus, you may develop keen insights into how love and values come together. This will help you know others better, and work and love with greater emotional intelligence!
Note: click on the emotional intelligence link to see how do you know if you are emotionally intelligent. Please feel free to share and don’t forget to FOLLOW the blog. Leave your comments below i’m always happy to hear your comments.
Happy Valentine for all lovers.
Cherish and enjoy the magic of LOVE.